Old School Ambie

Move over Christie's! It's time for some priceless, never before seen, works of art from the Ambie Archives!!

{Pedophiles Stop Drooling}
{{You're a couple decades too late}}
"Gonna Catch Me A Man with This Net" (The Farm, VA. c.1982)

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And now ladies & genltemen, a rare print from the Ambie Archives we call:

"The first and last time Amber ever stepped foot inside a McDonald's"

...Clearly, she'd rather eat her own finger than a happy meal.

.

It really transcendentalizes our notions of Americana, and captures the essence of our young Joan of Arc here, don't you think?

(hmmm...how did the parents not see 10yrs of Vogue collecting above this one's closet?)

Gratuitous Hot Shots - Part Deux!!

Hot Shots of Amber !!!!!!

La La La

Hot Shots of Amberrr





LA La Laaaaa





{That's my new song. It's gonna be a big big hit.}

"Hail Atlantis!"
-Donovan

Happy Gratuitous Hot Shots of Amber Day!! (bichos)!

Who does the Halle Berry 'do better than Halle Berry ?!

Jet lag or not !

(She basically waltzed into a salon in Japan, didn't speak a word, pointed to a picture, & got even hotter)

Who does the Madonna cool white suit/fidora/in a limo YRS BEFORE Madonna's music vid!?

(poor Madge had to settle for a cowboy hat just to be "different")

Who makes watching TV @ the Delano look high fashion?!

Who does Miami beach better than Kate Moss?

(Why yes, that is an homage to the Kate Moss i-D cover, '93)

((how clever of you to notice))

Who DOES NOT WKOUT, looks BETTER in a BIKINI,

and makes anyone who does just look like Khloe Mandashian...

D@mn her.

Guess you can have your orchid, and eat it too.

Happy Gratuitous Hot Shots of Amber Day!

Brought to you by Novamber:

(Now in full throttle)

Amber The Family Girl -vs- Amber The Party Girl

Ahhh, Amber the Family Girl:

1. Lets her family roll out the laminated calligraphy poster,
2. Lets us wear funny paper glasses,
3. Puts on her velour pink teddy bear ballerina sweatshirt with a 3D tutu on it,
4. Allows for all of us to "make a big deal" and feel "No. 1" on her list of entrusted confidants before. . . . . .

Amber The Party Girl eschews all of us for her real posse of rad bad girlz!

Just checkout those gang symbols disguised as "funny faces."

Can you guess which Amber is older???
*Family members are ineligible. Do not give hints away.

Cast Your Vote under comments now!

Amber the Trendsetter

Guys, Ever wonder where 1/2 the 80's icons got their fab haircuts idea?...

That's right, Dorothy Hamil has our birthday girl to thank:

"Only 2 presents?! You know the blond doesn't count, right?"

Happy Birthday to the original high heels w/ sweat jumpsuit birthday girl:

& Happy NovAmber to the rest of us Bichos & Amber Posers:

Sorry Riri- Sweatpants + heels have been done!

Happy NovAMBER Everybody~!

Can't Decide which ice cream flavor to abscond with first?

Feelin extra Frisky??

Having a hard time NOT being the center of attention???

...Then it MUST be your birthday month!

And we're gonna celebrate it royally...

Happy NovAmber bichos.

Guys, I was totally kidding

I did NOT go to Hawaii to do a run-trail.

I went -- We ALL went to support our little Monkey.

@lisa was the nice sister that spent her time in Hawaii making Giant ASH signs.

(Doesn't Eliot look like a Polynesian Shaman King Wise Man or something?)

So Ash qualified for the World Championship X-Terra Triathlon. It's kind of a big deal. Or at least the 600+ athletes from all over the world thought so.

She swam for a mile (it's longer than it sounds. Just kidding - it sounds long).

She biked maybe 18 miles

And ran 7 -- for a total of 1 Marathon. Right? Is that how it works?

All i know is - we forbade her from competing in an Iron Man.
Because:
1. Who has the time to watch that?
2. They are not natural - Man is not supposed to do things like that.
3. If Ash wanted to go slow - she could just do an X-Terra in heels.

Guys, Hawaii wasn't just a vacation

I ran an off-trail 5K.

It was serious.

Thank goodness I had my team there to help me:

Jealous?

No?
This doesn't make you jealous?
Even though it's the stage where Uhh Yeah Dude performed - just steps away from me?

OK, how about this:




So my favorite podcast doesn't do it but a trip to Hawaii does?!

Guys, I just can't help myself

I can't get enough of Little Moo and her sexy mom.

I know she has a blog that gets updated fairly regularly but it's just not enough for me because I'm selfish.

I wish they had a reality show just about Maisie.
We could have an episode where she only eats things that start with a "P" like peaches and pepperoni.
And we could dress her up in different themes and then that theme dictates what she does all day. Like one day be a kitty and she has to wear ears and tail and not be affectionate and hide in my closet and knock all my stuff over. Then the next day she can dress up as Liberace and play the piano and wear sequin jumpsuits and make old women swoon.
Then one episode can be the one where we 'lose her' on a public bus and we search all over the city for her but in reality she's been next door the whole time having tea with Ms. Hampshiredom.

Michy, you'll never let me alone with Kitty now huh?

Uh oh Guys, I told you I loved Weddings

So I might have gotten married this weekend.

I'm not sure - those CA. laws are always changing.

OK, fine I didn't get married.

But I did go to a Rock 'N' Roll wedding.

See?

It was the kind of wedding where everyone dances barefoot in the rain

Even if you're the bride:

My Persian Princess wasn't the bride as I'd have you believe from the first photo. She was the Best Lady. Ever.